My OB says I should get pregnant

Well, not really.  He just says that if my hubby and me are going to try for #5, that it would be ideal if I can get pregnant in the next three months.  That way, I’d be pregnant and deliver entirely within my 34th year.  If I get pregnant and my due date is even one day after my 35th birthday, he says that there are a boatload more precautions that he’ll have to take, additional tests, etc., since the incidence of both baby abnormalities and difficulties for the momma increase dramatically when one turns 35. 

Frankly, I’m not concerned.  I’d keep the baby no matter what the flaw, and the birth of every child gets easier for me as time progresses.  Well, not “easy,” but comparatively so.  Less complicated.  More confident.  More peace, no panic. 

The only thing that concerns me a teensy bit is that the incidence rate for twins increases, too, and although I think twins would be so cool, I don’t think I’m up for parenting six kids.  Twins run in my family — at least they used to, on my mom’s side, skipping a generation, which means that I or one of my maternal cousins should parent twins, but none of us do, yet.

There are so many things I want to accomplish before another baby arrives… but a) I’ve felt like that about every baby, and b) I don’t want to wait too long, because I’d want the new baby & Audrey to be 2.5 years apart or less, which means I’d have to get pregnant by December.

And all this is assuming that I’d get pregnant as quickly as I did with the other four…  And, it’s assuming that eventually, both my hubby and I will eventually slip from 80% pro-baby to 100% pro-baby.  I don’t want us to partially want a baby.  I want us to really want the baby, and we’re not quite there yet.

We’ll see.  🙂 


About Karen Joy

I'm a partially-homeschooling mother of six -- 3 boys ages 19, 17 and 15 years old, and three girls: 11, 8, and 3. I like birding, reading, writing, organic gardening, singing, playing guitar, hiking, the outdoors, and books. I very casually lead a very large group of homeschooling families in the Phoenix area. I have a dear hubby who designs homes for a local home builder and who is the worship pastor of our church. I live in the desert, which I used to hate, but now appreciate.

Posted on June 22, 2007, in Birth, Marriage, Medical Stuff, Motherhood, Parenting, Pregnancy, The Dear Hubby, The Kids. Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. Rubber Chicken Girl

    Like on day 1 past 3 months, it’s ALL OVER!? How silly!!

  2. Yeah, my OB is very cautious. I both love him for it, and am annoyed by it.

  3. You know, I think all of those “necessary” tests can be so bogus. When I was pregnant at 30 with our 3rd, the belief was that he’d have Downs. Well, we’d have dealt with it if he had, but at that point, we decided no more tests. He was fine even though the numbers in one test said otherwise. Btw, I had 5 babies between 32 and 43 (when the last was born) and no twins (but they run in ours back-aways too) and no problems.

    Doctors. Sheesh.

  4. Melissa ~ I’ve thought about going no more tests, too…. And I didn’t know your least one was born when you were 43!! I’m impressed.

  5. I’m with Melissa. In fact, I had a good chuckle about your doctor stating he’d HAVE to run the tests. I’ve had two children during “advanced maternal age” so far and they have never HAD to run tests on me because I refuse (can’t handle the stress). We do have two high-level u/s due to our risk of birth defects (which itself is fairly high) but the only one with anything a test could have picked up was my second and we had him when I was 32 so… The only other “special” test we have is a blood test to check my hormone level, which is always too low, so I can take some pills to lower my risk for miscarriage.

    Well, I was going to say one more thing but I’ll get off my soapbox now and just finish by saying…have the baby when you are ready and tell the doc to jump in a lake…well, nicely, of course. 🙂

  6. DBM ~ 😆 Will do. Jump in the lake. Hehehe. Actually, I really like this doc, because he is non-establishment — skeptical of most drugs and insurance companies and federal medical policy — and he’s very friendly to my non-intervention style of birthing. And my hubby feels better with me under the care of a doctor, though I’ve shown that, for birthing (at least so far) that I don’t need a doctor…

  7. I know this is an old post. I just found it hilarious. Today it’s OK to give birth. Tomorrow there is lots of risk. What in the world?!

    Doctors can be so illogical sometimes! 🙂

  8. I just got a letter in the mail last week, saying that, in February, he’s going to retire. So, I’m wondering if that played into him telling me to get pregnant right away…

    I just read a fantastic story last week in our newspaper, about parents choosing not to abort their Down’s Syndrome babies (which are more common after age 35). The startling, atrocious, sad stat is that NINE out of TEN expectant mothers abort their Down’s babies!!!!!!! I had NO IDEA that the abortion rate was so astronomical for DS babies. Makes me wanna hug every momma that I see with a DS baby.

  9. You know, I am very freaked out about the having-a-baby-over-35 issue. I keep thinking: “Well, it was difficult enough for me to have a baby at 31, what’s going to happen if I’m 35+?” But I don’t know if that is logical. Reading this has given me some perspective. I also really appreciate what you said about being 100% pro-baby. At the moment I’m probably about 40% pro-baby and the whole of that 40% is: “Kiko would so love a baby brother or sister”… which doesn’t seem like the *best* reason to bring another person into the world. If I crack up, everyone will suffer. You know, I think I am going to put this whole issue out of my mind for at least a year and then revisit it. I’m going to stop age 35 hanging over my head like a guillotine!

    By the way, my mother-in-law had a baby at age 43 – Kiko’s Daddy! – and she had a baby at 36 too (and another seven before that!)

  10. i am trying at 39. and you don’t need to have the tests.

  1. Pingback: Decreasing the Abortion Rate of Down’s Syndrome Babies « Only Sometimes Clever

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