The re-entry blues

We’re back.

I officially have the re-entry blues.

I would so much rather be in Colorado.

Taking trips are such a double-edged sword for me.  I have never adored the Phoenix area — this is where I grew up, and where I swore I’d never live — but I work really, really hard valuing what’s good about my locale, and not having any kind of bad attitude about living here.  That’s the main reason I started birding, and working on identifying native flowers and such;  I’ve found that the more intimately I know this desert, the more I appreciate it.  I work to bloom where I’m planted, and to not be seeking that green grass that really is on the other side of the fence.  Still, there’s something about rain, and green rolling hills, and creeks, and trees, and seasons that stir such intensity in my heart;  those things compel me to worship my Creator, and I simply delight in all the life that is supported by water — the flowers, the abundant wildlife:  nature.  I feel like I was made to live in a place like Colorado, and that being in a city in the desert is antithetical to where I am supposed to be.  I love living in jeans with a long-sleeved shirt tied around my middle.  I love my kids to spend endless hours outdoors enjoying creation.  I love cold nights where I can comfortably snuggle up to my hubby.  I love the green and mountainous landscape.  I love towns with one teensy one-screen theater.  I love the absence of the bustle and schedule of the city.

My hubby and I were talking about all of this on the way home.  We talked about it for a long while, in fact:  What do we do with these compelling thoughts?  Is God doing something?  Is He preparing us for a move?  Or, what?  What is this stirring?  What is it towards?  Anything?  And what about ministry?  Martin being a worship leader and us being super-involved in a church we absolutely dearly love is a *HUGE* part of who we are, and is the main thing that keeps us anchored to Phoenix.  We adore our pastor.  We cherish the people with whom we serve.  We feel privileged to be where we are, learning the things we’ve learned, growing spiritually.  There is such a dearth of healthy, vibrant, Spirit-filled churches in the U.S., and I can’t fully express my gratitude that God has us where He does, church-wise.  And, yet, this is the first time — ever — that we have both felt like, “Maybe…. just maybe…. we could live here.”  “Here” in Colorado, that is.  We would have to hear with abundant clarity from God the Father if such was the case.  We will be in prayer, and having our antennae tuned ever more carefully to His voice — yet not reading too much into our current angst, not letting our simple emotions lead us, and calling it “God.”  (Hope that makes sense.)  Martin’s vocation of architecture, CAD and home-building is in high demand in any growing community; and me homeschooling makes us mobile.  Most folks are concerned about jobs and schools in a move;  our first — and near ONLY true — priority would be church- and ministry-related. 

~sigh~

I’ll probably post way-too-many pictures and stories of our trip when I’m feeling more chipper.  For now, I’ll just leave y’all with the reminder that curiosity at the river’s edge makes for one delightedly muddy baby.

First…
 DSC04805.jpg picture by Karen-Joy

And then…
DSC04811.jpg picture by Karen-Joy

Finally:
  DSC04820.jpg picture by Karen-Joy

Advertisements

About Karen Joy

I'm a partially-homeschooling mother of six -- 3 boys ages 19, 17 and 15 years old, and three girls: 11, 8, and 3. I like birding, reading, writing, organic gardening, singing, playing guitar, hiking, the outdoors, and books. I very casually lead a very large group of homeschooling families in the Phoenix area. I have a dear hubby who designs homes for a local home builder and who is the worship pastor of our church. I live in the desert, which I used to hate, but now appreciate.

Posted on September 5, 2007, in Arizona, birding, Christian Living, Colorado, God/Christianity/Church, Introspective Musings, Life in the Desert, Loving Nature!, Sad Things, Summer Plans, The Dear Hubby, The Kids, Travelling, Weather, Whining. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. What wonderful muddy pictures!

  2. Well, I gotta comment. Lemme tell ya, I went to Colo Spgs for just 2 days in July and wondered what I was doing in boring old MO. It is just beautiful!!! CO is that way and yet people who live there tell me they hate the cold winter, like it lasts forever. Kinda like people who come to visit Phoenix and love the visit but have no idea the living. The desert IS beautiful, but not if you feel stuck or if you just got thru a really hot stretch of 110’s.

    I heard Rick Joyner make an interesting statement on GODTV recently, saying that we are such a mobile society people move for jobs and are bereft of friendship, and most importantly, a good church. Consider the church you are in and then the job offer was his statement. He commented about the many people who come from all over the world to be prophecied over at his church because there is such a need for good churches, like you say. He said it should not be that folks have to fly in to hear the Word of the Lord. I agree. I am sure you will weigh carefully your choices. We have suffered without a good church and would probably make that a more important priority should moving be an issue. I commend you for working so hard on contentment in the place you are at.

  3. Your little guys looks so delightful and full of joy.

    You make a very interesting point about moving and finding a church. It is nice that homeschooling removes one big concern about moving to a new area. Phoenix night not be all you wanted in life but at least you aren’t stuck in the middle of a small town in Indiana. My dh is totally dedicated to his position and I don’t see any opportunity to move.

  4. Sara ~ Thanks! I thought so, myself. 😉

    Lisa ~ I totally agree with you about Rick Joyner’s statement. I have thought similarly about my pastor and my church’s influence. It’s not as widespread as many others, but folks do come from around the world to be fed there. I’ve thought, “Can’t they receive this closer to home?” I mean, I am *so thrilled* that our church/my pastor can give them what they need. But it seems shameful to me, somehow, that their local body can’t provide it, instead. Yet… there *is* something to the idea of travelling away from your own norm to meet with God — hence, the “retreat,” which isn’t a bad idea at all… I’m not sure what to think about that whole thing, sometimes. …. In regards to wanting to move: I have never lived anywhere where it snowed a lot, and my exalted thoughts of Colorado may change under the weight of 2 ft of snow on the ground… 🙂 This morning, I felt compelled to read all of 1st John — to me, its words are the epitome of “the grass is NOT greener on the other side.” There *is* no life, no true life, apart from God. So, I confirmed to Him that though my desires are for the green, rolling hills, my greater desire is to be where He wants us to be.

    Nina ~ It’s funny — I think I’d like to be trapped in a small town in Indiana! My extended family is all from Illinois, and I’m well-acquainted with small-town Midwest life, and there’s lots that I love about it. For me, the grass is greener one way, and for you, it’s the opposite. Bloom where we’re planted, indeed, eh?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: