I asked my husband his opinion on something this afternoon, and, much to my surprise, he replied, “Oh, no. A wise man will stay out of that debate.” Wha?? I assured him that I wasn’t trying to trick him into anything — I’m just not like that — but he would still barely touch it, though I insisted that I really did want his thoughts. Finally, he rather begrudgingly said, “Well, I guess you’re a net zero” which didn’t entirely answer my question.I guess I should have realized that in any issue with weight, most husbands would need to tread carefully, but I could probably count on one hand (if I was keeping track) the number of discussions we’ve had — that either of us have brought up — about my weight, lo, these 13.5 years of marriage.
Here’s what I asked him: “Ever since Ethan, 10 years ago, once I’ve shed my pregnancy weight, my weight has always settled at 155. However, this winter, I don’t know if it was the holidays, or a trip we took in January, or what, but I gained five pounds. And it was at that point that I got pregnant with this baby. In the first 12 weeks or so of pregnancy, I lost 8 pounds, which had me down to 152. The last six or eight weeks, I’ve been gaining weight, and now I’m back up to 160, where I started. So, how should I count my weight this pregnancy? From where I started? From where I should have been? Or from the lowest point in the pregnancy?”
It probably doesn’t matter that much, but I’m leaning to counting it from the weight I should have been, 155 lbs.
I pulled out my trusty Pregnancy Journal, which is an excellent day-by-day guide to pregnancy*; I purchased it when I was newly pregnant with Ethan. For each pregnancy I’ve had, I track where the baby is at in his/her development, checking in every week or so. (The boys love having me check, too. They ask, nearly daily, how big the baby is. They think it’s great that the baby is about 7″ now, about the length of a Barbie doll, and nearly a pound, or the weight of a package of butter. I pulled a pack of butter out of the freezer, which, coincidentally, is about 7″ long, and each of them held it…) There are notes in it that I’d written when pregnant with E, about 11 years ago. Right now, with this baby, I’m at 21 weeks, and “net zero” for weight gain. At 23 weeks pregnant with Ethan, I had gained TWENTY-TWO. Now, it’s not like I’m not trying to gain weight — I ate several handfulls of gummi bears just a couple of hours ago — but, honestly, I’m glad I’m not gaining weight like gangbusters like in nearly all four of my previous pregnancies.
So, where would you count it from, if it was your pregnancy?
* My only beef with this book is that they start day one, week one with conception. Of course, that makes sense, as a woman is technically pregnant, on average, for 38 weeks. However, doctors count the weeks based on the start of one’s last cycle, as it is usually impossible to pinpoint the actual date of conception; the date of one’s LMP is much more reliable. So, that means that the book is consistently two weeks behind how one normally counts weeks of pregnancy. Right now, by the book, I’m 19 weeks, but by my doctor’s count, based on LMP, I’m 21.