The prophetic, ballerinas, guitar, and investing in others
So, a few weeks ago, in kinship (sort of like a midweek Bible study), during ministry time, the leader, Jonathan, came over to pray for me. During that time, he said something like, “I see you as a ballerina, like a Russian ballerina, with a bunch of little girls around you, learning from you.” Only maybe 20 minutes later, a young woman in the kinship named Amy came up to me and said, “I have a guitar that’s actually my mother’s, but she said I could use. Would you teach me to play?”
Now, normally, I think I would resist. I am SO NOT an expert guitar player*. I am mostly self-taught, and I have some bad habits**, and I mostly play guitar just to have something to accompany my voice — the best guitar players are the other way around: they play to accompany someone else’s voice. But… do I know more than Amy? Yes***. Can I at least get her started? Yes. She doesn’t even know how to change strings and tune up her guitar… So, tonight, which is our first meeting, that’s where we’re starting: Putting some fresh strings on and tuning. If we get to it, I printed off a few pages of simple music theory and chord charts. I told her that if she was willing to make the drive out to my house, and accommodate my tricky schedule, I’d give her lessons for free, once every two weeks. Because she’s not paying me, that releases me from all sorts of pressure.
I have long been hesitant to be a LEADER, to step into any kind of role with authority and responsibility. I also get fearful of disappointing people, like if they have certain expectations of me that I can’t live up to. But, I think that it’s time to stop avoiding leadership due to fear, and invest in someone besides my own self. Plus, the connection between Jonathan’s word over me and Amy’s request was undeniable.
I’m looking forward to tonight’s meeting with Amy. I told her to come with her guitar, her new strings, and to trim the nails on her left hand VERY short. Even though I’m not REALLY a ballet virtuoso (or whatever they’re called), I’m excited about seeing the prophetic put into action. 🙂
* I do, however, have a strong voice and I lead worship in that kinship.
** Like keeping my left thumb looped over the top of the fretboard so that I can quickly pick up the F# when I play a D. But, this leads to difficulty in shifting to barre chords, because my thumb is in the wrong place… added with my weak hands (or something) that results in me perennially avoiding barre chords; I will transpose just about any song and throw on a capo so I can keep playing in 1st position.
*** I also told Amy that if I teach her guitar, it will specifically be guitar for worship, not Awesome Shredder Fame-on-a-Stage guitar playing. The motivation for those two kinds of guitar playing are SO different, and it informs what and how you learn. She was all right with that. It’s what she wanted.